Tuesday, 19 May 2015
Hastag; The swastika of the trendy
Ehh...I despair muchly and then I get the news read by Catherine Morrison and all cares float away. They're replaced by rampant cognitive pornography but who's complaining and fuck knows what the news was about. Giggity.
Well the Norn Iron gay cakes row has reached one conclusion. I wasn't gonna say much but I do have questions...
Ok for a kick-off, Bert and Ernie, really? I don't know if they're hetrosexual, homosexual, bi-sexual...I don't think they're anything sexual. One, they're puppets! Two, it's a childrens TV programme for crying out loud, dreamt up the USA in the late 60s. Sexuality or sexual thought doesn't come into it. One of the benefits of being a kid is sex doesn't (or SHOULDN'T) trouble your life in any form until you're a teenager. Then the lonliness, misery, heartbreak and shit hits the fan not before and not necessarily in that order. I had just over ten peaceful years before having to deal with that crap, so stop sexualising everybody's childhood!!
Something else is what the bakers were doing. Well, as we know they accepted the order and a couple of days later cancelled it, either because of late second thoughts or to avoid a shouting match in the shop, whatever your take is on that.
They refused to bake the cake on the basis of their religious conscience, but what is that saying? When they get to Heaven they will be praised on an exemplary life but then the matter of the cake being baked to support gay marriage comes up? Is this really an ultimately human and egotistical move, being that exact and neurotic about your own salvation rather than bake a cake for some fella? Humans have used religion for ego purposes, don't be under any illusions there.
Then are they that devout and enveloped in their faith, taking a more in a more innocent perception here, it really cannot sit right with their conscience for them to accept such an order? If they are then you can only wish the best for them as they have a sense of peace that the rest of us can only dream of.
The answer to all these questions is...I don't know.
Except maybe, just maybe, this concern over cakes is like cartoons. Something to focus on with such microscopic examination to the exclusion and loss of the greater message religion is trying to teach us; How we can be at peace with ourselves and each other. Yep that one is utterly baffling to humans.
In the end...I'll be surprised if this stays posted but I am also glad to get some of these thoughts released or put down. Yeah maybe the latter, I'll get onto Dignitas then.
Bisson
Thursday, 14 May 2015
Something's wrong...
I spent a good fifteen years of my life in a basement. Now I'm relegated to a tiny bedroom every night. I've gone very badly wrong somewhere...
Still not as bad as the UK anyway. Oxford dictionaries will provide a new definition of the term "fucked" which will be 'The UK in the years 2015 to 2020'. How? Why? How on Earth could such a state befall Britain, that gangrenous isle, that dried up piece of shit clinging to the pubic hair of planet Earth? Yes that Britain. Well what happened was the people in the south of England, you're going to love this, did a very silly thing. Well I'll tell you what they did. They re-elected the Tory party of "Dave" Cunteron to be the majority government of the country for the next five years. And no that is not a typo. Nor some horrible nightmare we have yet to awaken from. This is happening. We have the Tories ruling our lives for the next five, long years. Form an orderly queue at Beachy Head folks if you can afford to get there, beat the rush.
What, wait? Suicide is preferable to five more years of the Tories?! It's more humane certainly. Tories only have an electorate just to watch them die, very, very slowly. Ian Duncunt Smith will strip everybody of their welfare and pensions to pay off some rich guys who wasted their own money eight years ago and then videotape all those dying of exposure and starvation which he will then wank himself off to, cos, y'know, he's into that. Jeremy Cunt will charge people for being ill, a hundred pounds per cold please. How dare you get ill. Gorgeous George Oscunt will make every moment of your existence a horror show as he's good at that and so on...
Ok you get it! Life's going to be hell from here on in, that point was clearly made with some bludgeoned subtlety and yes it's all the fault of the south of England and yes the politicians are all liars and deviants who enjoy hurting you. You've heard the same freaking out rhetoric already here and elsewhere. Change the record to something new!
Well, I would argue there is still a fresh fear within these tired old rants. This isn't being a bad loser at the result. How could it be? I'm not wired that way plus most of the population didn't bother to vote and no viable alternative would ever be voted for. Milibot was not going to get in on a majority vote and it's way easier to scare those who do bother to vote into voting Tory with enough bullshit headines. The next thing is "Dave" has come out and said Britain is too tolerant and should interfere in people's lives more. Yes, that is what you have elected. The state suddenly re-exists but not in a Marxist sense, ooh no, that was about people not profit and people are useless when it comes to making real money. Prepare for the sound of your bones crushing under the wheels of state if you don't tow the line more.
Still Scotland has the SNP totally ruling the roost. Or move to the Republic of Ireland. They'll still fuck you over but do it in a charming and lyrical way. We're all doomed anyway so may as well have a bit of poetry to the demise...
Hang on, you say, the placement of the word 'cunt' in the names of leading Tories?! That's the best you can come up with?! Well I ain't got much but that I have and it's worth something as we live in the Age of the Puerile now folks.
Bisson
Still not as bad as the UK anyway. Oxford dictionaries will provide a new definition of the term "fucked" which will be 'The UK in the years 2015 to 2020'. How? Why? How on Earth could such a state befall Britain, that gangrenous isle, that dried up piece of shit clinging to the pubic hair of planet Earth? Yes that Britain. Well what happened was the people in the south of England, you're going to love this, did a very silly thing. Well I'll tell you what they did. They re-elected the Tory party of "Dave" Cunteron to be the majority government of the country for the next five years. And no that is not a typo. Nor some horrible nightmare we have yet to awaken from. This is happening. We have the Tories ruling our lives for the next five, long years. Form an orderly queue at Beachy Head folks if you can afford to get there, beat the rush.
What, wait? Suicide is preferable to five more years of the Tories?! It's more humane certainly. Tories only have an electorate just to watch them die, very, very slowly. Ian Duncunt Smith will strip everybody of their welfare and pensions to pay off some rich guys who wasted their own money eight years ago and then videotape all those dying of exposure and starvation which he will then wank himself off to, cos, y'know, he's into that. Jeremy Cunt will charge people for being ill, a hundred pounds per cold please. How dare you get ill. Gorgeous George Oscunt will make every moment of your existence a horror show as he's good at that and so on...
Ok you get it! Life's going to be hell from here on in, that point was clearly made with some bludgeoned subtlety and yes it's all the fault of the south of England and yes the politicians are all liars and deviants who enjoy hurting you. You've heard the same freaking out rhetoric already here and elsewhere. Change the record to something new!
Well, I would argue there is still a fresh fear within these tired old rants. This isn't being a bad loser at the result. How could it be? I'm not wired that way plus most of the population didn't bother to vote and no viable alternative would ever be voted for. Milibot was not going to get in on a majority vote and it's way easier to scare those who do bother to vote into voting Tory with enough bullshit headines. The next thing is "Dave" has come out and said Britain is too tolerant and should interfere in people's lives more. Yes, that is what you have elected. The state suddenly re-exists but not in a Marxist sense, ooh no, that was about people not profit and people are useless when it comes to making real money. Prepare for the sound of your bones crushing under the wheels of state if you don't tow the line more.
Still Scotland has the SNP totally ruling the roost. Or move to the Republic of Ireland. They'll still fuck you over but do it in a charming and lyrical way. We're all doomed anyway so may as well have a bit of poetry to the demise...
Hang on, you say, the placement of the word 'cunt' in the names of leading Tories?! That's the best you can come up with?! Well I ain't got much but that I have and it's worth something as we live in the Age of the Puerile now folks.
Bisson
Saturday, 4 October 2014
The Worst Joke Ever
Does the media create and encourage violence? Are we by exposure to it made violent?
If so we were a completely peaceful species before the 20th Century. How they managed the St Bartholomew's Day Massacre before the advent of television I don't know. The Thirty Years War, no video nasties then?! You're kidding!
Actually I think unfairness encourages violence and I present my argument thus in a conjectural scenario:
Seeing UKIP give fascism its biggest kiss of life since 1945, inspires (or gives the shits to) the British Conservative party to be even more unfair than they have been already. Freezing benefits, further austerity cuts, removing the right of complaint to the European courts. Now none of this is to make Britain better; none of what the Tories have done so far makes Britain better. They are just working to the next election all the time rather than make things better. You make those who sponsor the party happy, you get elected. And you will shit yourself rightly if they start funding UKIP, so time to turn on those who are not sponsoring you, which is most of the population of Britain.
Austerity (when was the war?!) only serves the purpose of paying off the (non-existent in reality) debt and deficit and making sure capitalism remains untouched and totally free market. The (non-existent in reality) concept of the market must not suffer, but it's okay if lots of living and breathing beings do.Which is unfair.
So imagine this; The British population turn violent with this unfair situation and get hit-men (creating employment) to exact revenge.
Having already shot David Cameron through the throat to watch him die, a hit-man shoots Gorgeous George Osbourne in the leg (Ever heard of Durex in 1970 Mr and Mrs Osbourne? You heartless pair of cunts) . George is pulled into an NHS hospital. He insists he has the money to go private but the doctors claim it isn't safe. They then claim the bullet cannot be removed without death...a week after the shooting with the wound badly infected. So they claim the leg has to come off. They then claim they have no proper equipment due to NHS cuts and claim they will have to use a saw from B&Q with further claims there is no anaesthetic due to further NHS cuts. So the operation will take place with Osbourne awake and they're going to film it and post it on You Tube. Attempts to knock him out with a baseball bat are ineffective and gratuitous.
So you see exactly how unfairness begets violence! This violent situation could so easily happen and it's your fault Mr Cameron! You have caused your colleague all this suffering and your own death! How could you let the population be infected with such terror?
It won't happen of course, the population is too docile and well trained and they follow orders. They just turn the violence created by unfairness on themselves or vote UKIP. Adds up to being the same at the end of the day.
It makes no difference to them that our leaders do not have our best interests at heart and never did. A small example is marijuana being illegal; the main motivation behind this is because it was seen as a recreational drug of the Afro-Caribbean community and they didn't want white people trying it and causing miscegenation of the races. So there; it's illegal, not because they care about your health but because they are foaming racists. If they really worried about your health, alcohol and tobacco would have been proscribed long ago. They knew all about the dangers way back then. Scumfucks they may be; idiots they are not.
Bisson
If so we were a completely peaceful species before the 20th Century. How they managed the St Bartholomew's Day Massacre before the advent of television I don't know. The Thirty Years War, no video nasties then?! You're kidding!
Actually I think unfairness encourages violence and I present my argument thus in a conjectural scenario:
Seeing UKIP give fascism its biggest kiss of life since 1945, inspires (or gives the shits to) the British Conservative party to be even more unfair than they have been already. Freezing benefits, further austerity cuts, removing the right of complaint to the European courts. Now none of this is to make Britain better; none of what the Tories have done so far makes Britain better. They are just working to the next election all the time rather than make things better. You make those who sponsor the party happy, you get elected. And you will shit yourself rightly if they start funding UKIP, so time to turn on those who are not sponsoring you, which is most of the population of Britain.
Austerity (when was the war?!) only serves the purpose of paying off the (non-existent in reality) debt and deficit and making sure capitalism remains untouched and totally free market. The (non-existent in reality) concept of the market must not suffer, but it's okay if lots of living and breathing beings do.Which is unfair.
So imagine this; The British population turn violent with this unfair situation and get hit-men (creating employment) to exact revenge.
Having already shot David Cameron through the throat to watch him die, a hit-man shoots Gorgeous George Osbourne in the leg (Ever heard of Durex in 1970 Mr and Mrs Osbourne? You heartless pair of cunts) . George is pulled into an NHS hospital. He insists he has the money to go private but the doctors claim it isn't safe. They then claim the bullet cannot be removed without death...a week after the shooting with the wound badly infected. So they claim the leg has to come off. They then claim they have no proper equipment due to NHS cuts and claim they will have to use a saw from B&Q with further claims there is no anaesthetic due to further NHS cuts. So the operation will take place with Osbourne awake and they're going to film it and post it on You Tube. Attempts to knock him out with a baseball bat are ineffective and gratuitous.
So you see exactly how unfairness begets violence! This violent situation could so easily happen and it's your fault Mr Cameron! You have caused your colleague all this suffering and your own death! How could you let the population be infected with such terror?
It won't happen of course, the population is too docile and well trained and they follow orders. They just turn the violence created by unfairness on themselves or vote UKIP. Adds up to being the same at the end of the day.
It makes no difference to them that our leaders do not have our best interests at heart and never did. A small example is marijuana being illegal; the main motivation behind this is because it was seen as a recreational drug of the Afro-Caribbean community and they didn't want white people trying it and causing miscegenation of the races. So there; it's illegal, not because they care about your health but because they are foaming racists. If they really worried about your health, alcohol and tobacco would have been proscribed long ago. They knew all about the dangers way back then. Scumfucks they may be; idiots they are not.
Bisson
Wednesday, 24 September 2014
Betcha Nessie voted 'Yes'.
Jings!
Hoots and nae messing! You stay locked in a coital embrace with England's cock up your arse, that's the sort of shit you gotta put up. Oh flower of Scotland, when will we see your like again?! Not this fucking year anyway! You had your chance to breakaway from this lonely life and ye dinnae take it. You are the ultimate 'reciever' in national history then?!
Well you can stop all your William Wallace nonsense now. Especially as he fought and DIED for Scottish independence. Not like you bunch of chicken-shits! Not to mention Andrew Moray...actually he never gets a mention despite his importance...he still fucking fought and died for Scottish independence though!!
Ach, to be fair many people wanted to get Scotland out of there, to continue on this line does them an injustice. They were willing to take a leap and...I'm just as disappointed as they are. So enough of this shit, Bisson!
Actually Bannockburn was probably the wrong anniversary to do it on. A celebration of "stuffing" the English in battle? A minor moment of bliss and a blip in the arrogant and presumptuous narrative written by the winners; the English. Civvie Bisson is half English and he still finds them to be dicks, so anyway.
Now the Declaration of Arbroath in 1320...that would have been a much better anniversary. In fact if the SNP have a follow-up referendum that's a good un' to do it on.
Sure that declares that Scots seek independence for neither 'glory nor RICHES' but for freedom! See? You can stick all your economic fears up your arse then. Were they worried about that in the 14th Century? No!
Economics has been the downfall in the modern era of course. Scotland in 1707 was a country racked with the failure of a great enterprise in the Americas; the Darien Scheme in what would one day be Panama. Sure it would have evolved ethnic genocide and slavery as all these things in the western hemisphere did. Yet it was to take place in where they built the Panama Canal so there is a visionary element to it. However a lot of money was sunk in and the scheme totally fell to pieces. Plus it wasn't exactly flavour of the month with the English either so no help there or investors.
In 1707 England was more worried about the succession crisis; that the Scots might chose a different monarch to England and a Catholic one at that. There was a union of the crowns already (a long, boring story that I can't be arsed with). So Scotland had a choice; political union or economic siberia, in other words we block all trade with you and let you starve to death until you agree to a union. That was the democratic choice facing the peo...sorry the Scottish Parliament in 1707. It chose suicide over starvation and agreed to union.
And that's where our lovely Union comes from folks! Today and probably for the last 300 years beloved only by the politically constipated and the emotionally insecure. The politically constipated offered only misty-eyed words of a 'family of nations', which tended to make all who heard these words puke their lunch up not misty eyed. Urgh. Then they panicked, which briefly made them the politically flatulent and offered loads of new powers which all those who voted 'No' fell for hook, line and sinker. Never give a sucker an even break...or new powers either! Ever get the feeling you've been lied to? Ya fucking do now!
As for the emotionally unstable they came out with the SDL/Loyalists/C18 and made a stink; showed how violent and angry they get so quickly. Anger management? You want to see how easily these guys get angry; it's barely 20 seconds and they're foaming!
Was there vote rigging? Who knows and does it matter? Sure Bush got in the first time so why should it matter in Scotland and now? Did the over 55s vote on mass to stay so they're pensions would be protected? Their pensions are being stripped off them anyway by Westminster so I don't know why they bothered. Should have just stayed home and starved to death like the Tories want them to anyway. Bankers bonuses don't pay themselves you know...
Anyway, no point griping over the simple yes/no choice of 2014. It was way fucking better than the choice in 1707 for sure! So here's me ceasing to slag you and hoping you clear your heads for 2020...there is still hope which has more chance of existing in this universe than the concept of 'the economy' ever will outside the human mind!
Ps: The Queen purring is a disturbing fucking image, thanks "Dave". That alone should result in independence. He's good at fucking up is ol' "Dave" I must say; useless bastard at everything else but that's the elite for you.
Bisson
Hoots and nae messing! You stay locked in a coital embrace with England's cock up your arse, that's the sort of shit you gotta put up. Oh flower of Scotland, when will we see your like again?! Not this fucking year anyway! You had your chance to breakaway from this lonely life and ye dinnae take it. You are the ultimate 'reciever' in national history then?!
Well you can stop all your William Wallace nonsense now. Especially as he fought and DIED for Scottish independence. Not like you bunch of chicken-shits! Not to mention Andrew Moray...actually he never gets a mention despite his importance...he still fucking fought and died for Scottish independence though!!
Ach, to be fair many people wanted to get Scotland out of there, to continue on this line does them an injustice. They were willing to take a leap and...I'm just as disappointed as they are. So enough of this shit, Bisson!
Actually Bannockburn was probably the wrong anniversary to do it on. A celebration of "stuffing" the English in battle? A minor moment of bliss and a blip in the arrogant and presumptuous narrative written by the winners; the English. Civvie Bisson is half English and he still finds them to be dicks, so anyway.
Now the Declaration of Arbroath in 1320...that would have been a much better anniversary. In fact if the SNP have a follow-up referendum that's a good un' to do it on.
Sure that declares that Scots seek independence for neither 'glory nor RICHES' but for freedom! See? You can stick all your economic fears up your arse then. Were they worried about that in the 14th Century? No!
Economics has been the downfall in the modern era of course. Scotland in 1707 was a country racked with the failure of a great enterprise in the Americas; the Darien Scheme in what would one day be Panama. Sure it would have evolved ethnic genocide and slavery as all these things in the western hemisphere did. Yet it was to take place in where they built the Panama Canal so there is a visionary element to it. However a lot of money was sunk in and the scheme totally fell to pieces. Plus it wasn't exactly flavour of the month with the English either so no help there or investors.
In 1707 England was more worried about the succession crisis; that the Scots might chose a different monarch to England and a Catholic one at that. There was a union of the crowns already (a long, boring story that I can't be arsed with). So Scotland had a choice; political union or economic siberia, in other words we block all trade with you and let you starve to death until you agree to a union. That was the democratic choice facing the peo...sorry the Scottish Parliament in 1707. It chose suicide over starvation and agreed to union.
And that's where our lovely Union comes from folks! Today and probably for the last 300 years beloved only by the politically constipated and the emotionally insecure. The politically constipated offered only misty-eyed words of a 'family of nations', which tended to make all who heard these words puke their lunch up not misty eyed. Urgh. Then they panicked, which briefly made them the politically flatulent and offered loads of new powers which all those who voted 'No' fell for hook, line and sinker. Never give a sucker an even break...or new powers either! Ever get the feeling you've been lied to? Ya fucking do now!
As for the emotionally unstable they came out with the SDL/Loyalists/C18 and made a stink; showed how violent and angry they get so quickly. Anger management? You want to see how easily these guys get angry; it's barely 20 seconds and they're foaming!
Was there vote rigging? Who knows and does it matter? Sure Bush got in the first time so why should it matter in Scotland and now? Did the over 55s vote on mass to stay so they're pensions would be protected? Their pensions are being stripped off them anyway by Westminster so I don't know why they bothered. Should have just stayed home and starved to death like the Tories want them to anyway. Bankers bonuses don't pay themselves you know...
Anyway, no point griping over the simple yes/no choice of 2014. It was way fucking better than the choice in 1707 for sure! So here's me ceasing to slag you and hoping you clear your heads for 2020...there is still hope which has more chance of existing in this universe than the concept of 'the economy' ever will outside the human mind!
Ps: The Queen purring is a disturbing fucking image, thanks "Dave". That alone should result in independence. He's good at fucking up is ol' "Dave" I must say; useless bastard at everything else but that's the elite for you.
Bisson
Monday, 15 September 2014
Scottish Independence
Well I never!
I promised myself I was going to keep my particular hat out of this political ring. My ten cents were to remain in my pocket where as foreign currency they were useless anyway. Nope this was one for the regular pond life and I would just sit back and hope for the best.
But no joy and for one reason. After weeks of furious discussion I must congratulate the 'No' campaign in Scotland and Westminster for making me a 100 percent supporter of the 'Yes' vote. Go for it! VOTE FOR INDEPENDENCE NOW! Put as much distance between Scotland and these loonies as you can. Dig a canal on the border and float away, do it while you can!!
So something has gone BADLY wrong with the 'No' campaign to produce this reaction eh? Yes it has. I was an undecided guy, with a wistful love for the old Scottish nation before 1707 and all that. But if I was Scottish I would vote 'Yes' as much as possible and as many times as I could. Get the old trick of the dead out to vote just in the name of sanity!
Never in all my life have I heard such a suffocating tidal wave of negative thinking as I've heard from the 'No' campaign. I mean ok, voting 'no' is technically negative anyway but you know, you gotta have something worth voting 'no' for don't you? I've yet to hear it and there's only a few days left. They really will have to pull some cosmic rabbit out of a hat to impress me now. I mean aliens and inter-dimensional beings will need to prove their existence and get behind the 'No' vote now to change my mind...
The main problem is I've always found the concept of 'Union' to be a jaw-breaking yawn anyway. The most boring political invention of all time; no wonder they needed fear to get people behind it. That's the only excitement 'union' has ever produced. It was dull in 1707 and again in 1801 and just meant people ended up getting stuck at Westminster and nothing ever happens there. So you cannot appeal to me over the concept of 'union'. It is deeply miserable thing and is only of interest to historians and insomniacs. Better together? At what?! Sport? English xenophobia? Narcolepsy probably is the answer to what we do better together.
The warnings of what will happen if there's independence is the main bag of the 'No' campaign. Some really good negative vibes for them to send out there and they love being negative. Ok so, um NHS affected? Well it'll be out of the hands of the Tories so that's actually a blessing.
All the banks and businesses will go south? Oh dear that is actually quite serious. All the useless morons who tend to cause financial meltdowns will leave Scotland, how will the nation cope?! Just be ready for the jolt as the country leaps up a couple of feet in sea level due to the sudden idiot depletion. And then resultant gaps are filled will new ideas and bright business minds who've been looking for a chance for years to break through the glass ceiling. Yes the more you bang on about business leaving the more you point out what a wasteland of capitalism we have put ourselves in. The slow death of us all through credit and debt goes on, it's just an independent Scotland will have a few less turds rising to the top than the rest of us. Jammy swine!
Back in 1707 Scotland went into union with the threat of financial ruin unless the parliament signed away the country's independence. In 2014 Scotland must vote no or face financial ruin...interesting how up to date the tactics are these days, ain't they? Wow is Westminster using 21st Century arguments or what?! They may even have an app for it. '#orelse' probably. The one difference this time is the people themselves are being asked what they think. In 1707 it was UK or lump it. In 2014 it is their opinion deciding and nobody in Edinburgh is getting a bribe to vote the right way...well, I think so...
I'm going to be the last person to tell people how to vote but I can't vote and I wouldn't want to unless I was Scottish and in Scotland. Ancestry gets you a kilt but not a vote. I would vote Yes if I could so that's my invalid vote and possibly opinion anyway.
Bisson
I promised myself I was going to keep my particular hat out of this political ring. My ten cents were to remain in my pocket where as foreign currency they were useless anyway. Nope this was one for the regular pond life and I would just sit back and hope for the best.
But no joy and for one reason. After weeks of furious discussion I must congratulate the 'No' campaign in Scotland and Westminster for making me a 100 percent supporter of the 'Yes' vote. Go for it! VOTE FOR INDEPENDENCE NOW! Put as much distance between Scotland and these loonies as you can. Dig a canal on the border and float away, do it while you can!!
So something has gone BADLY wrong with the 'No' campaign to produce this reaction eh? Yes it has. I was an undecided guy, with a wistful love for the old Scottish nation before 1707 and all that. But if I was Scottish I would vote 'Yes' as much as possible and as many times as I could. Get the old trick of the dead out to vote just in the name of sanity!
Never in all my life have I heard such a suffocating tidal wave of negative thinking as I've heard from the 'No' campaign. I mean ok, voting 'no' is technically negative anyway but you know, you gotta have something worth voting 'no' for don't you? I've yet to hear it and there's only a few days left. They really will have to pull some cosmic rabbit out of a hat to impress me now. I mean aliens and inter-dimensional beings will need to prove their existence and get behind the 'No' vote now to change my mind...
The main problem is I've always found the concept of 'Union' to be a jaw-breaking yawn anyway. The most boring political invention of all time; no wonder they needed fear to get people behind it. That's the only excitement 'union' has ever produced. It was dull in 1707 and again in 1801 and just meant people ended up getting stuck at Westminster and nothing ever happens there. So you cannot appeal to me over the concept of 'union'. It is deeply miserable thing and is only of interest to historians and insomniacs. Better together? At what?! Sport? English xenophobia? Narcolepsy probably is the answer to what we do better together.
The warnings of what will happen if there's independence is the main bag of the 'No' campaign. Some really good negative vibes for them to send out there and they love being negative. Ok so, um NHS affected? Well it'll be out of the hands of the Tories so that's actually a blessing.
All the banks and businesses will go south? Oh dear that is actually quite serious. All the useless morons who tend to cause financial meltdowns will leave Scotland, how will the nation cope?! Just be ready for the jolt as the country leaps up a couple of feet in sea level due to the sudden idiot depletion. And then resultant gaps are filled will new ideas and bright business minds who've been looking for a chance for years to break through the glass ceiling. Yes the more you bang on about business leaving the more you point out what a wasteland of capitalism we have put ourselves in. The slow death of us all through credit and debt goes on, it's just an independent Scotland will have a few less turds rising to the top than the rest of us. Jammy swine!
Back in 1707 Scotland went into union with the threat of financial ruin unless the parliament signed away the country's independence. In 2014 Scotland must vote no or face financial ruin...interesting how up to date the tactics are these days, ain't they? Wow is Westminster using 21st Century arguments or what?! They may even have an app for it. '#orelse' probably. The one difference this time is the people themselves are being asked what they think. In 1707 it was UK or lump it. In 2014 it is their opinion deciding and nobody in Edinburgh is getting a bribe to vote the right way...well, I think so...
I'm going to be the last person to tell people how to vote but I can't vote and I wouldn't want to unless I was Scottish and in Scotland. Ancestry gets you a kilt but not a vote. I would vote Yes if I could so that's my invalid vote and possibly opinion anyway.
Bisson
Wednesday, 15 January 2014
From Outta The Blizzard
Wotcher! A groovy New Year and all that.
Bah! I'm back in Belfast, humbug! It isn't what you do, it's who you know on the costa del crime and my welcome mat is worn through to the arse.
May as well get this ribald merry-go-round going again as there's nowt else. Either that or a job and a flat...eurgh...
Actually I've discovered that jobs and flats are tres good for getting the ladies. This rooftop garret and mere payless effusion of ideas just don't cut it.We're talking guaranteed pussy here outside of prostitution of course, otherwise you fuck it when you get it. Beautiful bodies and ugly minds eh? Same old story. We never were much as a species were we? The putridness of my mind I chose to put to creative effort though, while you guys choose to putrify the world. Each to their own and that.
I was amazed that job et flat still counted. The scar tissue on my heart and mind from when that last happened is of some age I tell you. Its true that if you do have a job and a flat then guaranteed pussy takes no effort whatsoever. This is why the porridge men are indeed the wisest fools. Jammy bastards when you think about it; they don't care if they're stuck in a shitty job, they sit around doing nothing without a pang of guilt and pussy-spunking every couple of years is the most they have to rouse themselves to. All my insults towards them is mere farting in the wind; wisest fools I tell you! They don't have to lift a finger and the women are buzzing around them. Never mind the alpha male, the mindless couch potato he turns into with age is the greater threat.
See if you're the sort of person who stops to consider things, you're doomed to a lonely and frustrated existence and to play the fool takes so much fucking effort. Frank Zappa gave the right advice but being mindless takes time and practice with no guarantees. You'll have to REALLY want to tap that particular pussy. Even reeling them in for a one-time deal takes effort and energy.
I know, I know what a futile practice it is, what a complete and utter waste of time and life!! You can't fight biology however; urge to couple mainly comes back again and again...to kick the shit out of you.
You may be saying auld Bisson's heart is quite black and indeed it is. Remember the most important fact is, it was shaded that way for me over a long period of time. Not by choice folks, I assure ye!
Anyway, job and flat...Pfff! Fold it carefully and stick that opinion back up your arse where it came from.
It is lovely to be back to the old grind sometimes. How nice to hurl the abuse of the human race back at it. You inspire me greatly, you lovely hoard of insensitive dickheads. See you around the u-bend again!
Bisson
Bah! I'm back in Belfast, humbug! It isn't what you do, it's who you know on the costa del crime and my welcome mat is worn through to the arse.
May as well get this ribald merry-go-round going again as there's nowt else. Either that or a job and a flat...eurgh...
Actually I've discovered that jobs and flats are tres good for getting the ladies. This rooftop garret and mere payless effusion of ideas just don't cut it.We're talking guaranteed pussy here outside of prostitution of course, otherwise you fuck it when you get it. Beautiful bodies and ugly minds eh? Same old story. We never were much as a species were we? The putridness of my mind I chose to put to creative effort though, while you guys choose to putrify the world. Each to their own and that.
I was amazed that job et flat still counted. The scar tissue on my heart and mind from when that last happened is of some age I tell you. Its true that if you do have a job and a flat then guaranteed pussy takes no effort whatsoever. This is why the porridge men are indeed the wisest fools. Jammy bastards when you think about it; they don't care if they're stuck in a shitty job, they sit around doing nothing without a pang of guilt and pussy-spunking every couple of years is the most they have to rouse themselves to. All my insults towards them is mere farting in the wind; wisest fools I tell you! They don't have to lift a finger and the women are buzzing around them. Never mind the alpha male, the mindless couch potato he turns into with age is the greater threat.
See if you're the sort of person who stops to consider things, you're doomed to a lonely and frustrated existence and to play the fool takes so much fucking effort. Frank Zappa gave the right advice but being mindless takes time and practice with no guarantees. You'll have to REALLY want to tap that particular pussy. Even reeling them in for a one-time deal takes effort and energy.
I know, I know what a futile practice it is, what a complete and utter waste of time and life!! You can't fight biology however; urge to couple mainly comes back again and again...to kick the shit out of you.
You may be saying auld Bisson's heart is quite black and indeed it is. Remember the most important fact is, it was shaded that way for me over a long period of time. Not by choice folks, I assure ye!
Anyway, job and flat...Pfff! Fold it carefully and stick that opinion back up your arse where it came from.
It is lovely to be back to the old grind sometimes. How nice to hurl the abuse of the human race back at it. You inspire me greatly, you lovely hoard of insensitive dickheads. See you around the u-bend again!
Bisson
Tuesday, 5 November 2013
Friends, Romans, Berks
They say it never blows a gale on the costa, but I know otherwise...
Here! This is a notion and suggesting it pisses off the TUV so that's double the reason to throw it out there.
Just to infuriate your average hog wanker, to solve all this bullshit in the Norn of Iron, instead they set up a United Ireland. Purely because it hasen't been done before.
Now, before y'all run to your loudspeakers to bitch, read your history. Everybody goes on about that non-existent shit all the time so why not fucking read it for once!
Ireland was never a single political unit in neolithic, celtic or gaelic christian times. Even when the Norman angles came in, it was still a patchwork of kingdoms, each trying to rule the other. Politcal union only really occured in times of war, viking invasions and that and even then wasn't quite the real deal.
Ireland was effectively united when English and later British kings/queens stopped ruling their countries and instead resorted to jerking off while staring into the mirror. That's when they got shifted of surplus Prods, all the born again pains in the arse who later went on to such great things in Norn Iron and Alabama with all those similar clubs and societies of theirs; the LOL and the KKK and etc.
Ireland united under British rule doesn't count. The Republic becomes independant, but six counties stay and you know the rest of the bollocks.
We've tried everything else; direct rule, local assembly. Nothing works, so go for a united Ireland. If it's 'The Answer' (copyright, tm, patent pending) as all nationalists have believed all these years then the sun will shine and we will be the only people on earth where everything is great and all that. If it fucks up then, well, at least we tried and in any case we'll still be pretty much in the same pile of shit we've always been in. Weird eh? Fleg or no fleg, we're still in the shite. I'm starting to think a bit of cloth has no bearing on reality here...
Speaking of Alabamy, if you're home from a hard day masturbating pigs and your better half and two quarters wants to watch a film, here's a chance to get the moral high ground. Well, not all boar wankers can claim the high ground. I can think of one exception/exclusion, but he's a right cunt, so it doesn't matter
(That shot was for you Junax).
Anyway, here's guessing what she will want to watch: Gone With The Wind. Never has such a jaw-breaking bore been committed to celluloid. There are other God-awful, boring films, true. But this one is four loooong hours! You could have had a good sleep in that time, never mind wasting it watching such a dopey movie.
Plus if you say you don't want to watch it, she may pull some weapons out of the guilt arsenal. For example:
'But I really like this film'
'I wanted to watch it with you'
'This means so much to me'
'I want to watch this romantic film as a couple'
'Do my feelings not matter to you?'
And so on and so on, ad infinitum.
Sounds familiar. It's weird, you can't take classes in emotional blackmail, you just have a knack for it. Plus if it worked on your dad, then it'll work on any bloke. So you can't fight lightning, but here's what you can do, with a greater awareness of this film that first imagined. When your lady friend suggests watching it, then you say something along the lines of:
'Gee darling, I would love to watch this film, but its a four hour celebration of white supremacy and slavery'
It is! The title is 'Gone with the wind', mourning the loss of the rich, slave-owing society of the pre-civil war south. And all the African Americans in that film. They are slaves! Where are the whip scars on their backs? Where are the scenes of them doing back-breaking labour for 12 hours to make their masters rich? Where are the scenes of when their children were sold as slaves to make more money. They aren't in the film. But it's happening, all the time. In the background. What sort of horrible shit is your girlfriend expecting you to watch here?!
The characters. All the white women are self-absorbed pains in the ass who have to take siestas in the afternoon when the weather gets a bit hot. Aww! Er, have you looked out in the fucking plantation fields recently?! You wanna talk about suffering? All they think about is Ashley bleeding Wilkes. How do you think he got to be so rich? Rhett Butler looks like he hasn't done a days work in his life. He disapproves of slavery? Oh well, that's ok then, that's that problem solved! If you're cheering when the Union troops burn Atlanta, you know you're watching the wrong film for you.
Four hours of KKK propaganda? Not tonight darling, sorry. How did you get into this shit anyway? Now I think of it, how much your mum loves white bedsheets.
To avoid tilting at the windmills of Godwin's Law here, we shall conclude. Remember to stick by your pool and just chill out.
Bisson
Here! This is a notion and suggesting it pisses off the TUV so that's double the reason to throw it out there.
Just to infuriate your average hog wanker, to solve all this bullshit in the Norn of Iron, instead they set up a United Ireland. Purely because it hasen't been done before.
Now, before y'all run to your loudspeakers to bitch, read your history. Everybody goes on about that non-existent shit all the time so why not fucking read it for once!
Ireland was never a single political unit in neolithic, celtic or gaelic christian times. Even when the Norman angles came in, it was still a patchwork of kingdoms, each trying to rule the other. Politcal union only really occured in times of war, viking invasions and that and even then wasn't quite the real deal.
Ireland was effectively united when English and later British kings/queens stopped ruling their countries and instead resorted to jerking off while staring into the mirror. That's when they got shifted of surplus Prods, all the born again pains in the arse who later went on to such great things in Norn Iron and Alabama with all those similar clubs and societies of theirs; the LOL and the KKK and etc.
Ireland united under British rule doesn't count. The Republic becomes independant, but six counties stay and you know the rest of the bollocks.
We've tried everything else; direct rule, local assembly. Nothing works, so go for a united Ireland. If it's 'The Answer' (copyright, tm, patent pending) as all nationalists have believed all these years then the sun will shine and we will be the only people on earth where everything is great and all that. If it fucks up then, well, at least we tried and in any case we'll still be pretty much in the same pile of shit we've always been in. Weird eh? Fleg or no fleg, we're still in the shite. I'm starting to think a bit of cloth has no bearing on reality here...
Speaking of Alabamy, if you're home from a hard day masturbating pigs and your better half and two quarters wants to watch a film, here's a chance to get the moral high ground. Well, not all boar wankers can claim the high ground. I can think of one exception/exclusion, but he's a right cunt, so it doesn't matter
(That shot was for you Junax).
Anyway, here's guessing what she will want to watch: Gone With The Wind. Never has such a jaw-breaking bore been committed to celluloid. There are other God-awful, boring films, true. But this one is four loooong hours! You could have had a good sleep in that time, never mind wasting it watching such a dopey movie.
Plus if you say you don't want to watch it, she may pull some weapons out of the guilt arsenal. For example:
'But I really like this film'
'I wanted to watch it with you'
'This means so much to me'
'I want to watch this romantic film as a couple'
'Do my feelings not matter to you?'
And so on and so on, ad infinitum.
Sounds familiar. It's weird, you can't take classes in emotional blackmail, you just have a knack for it. Plus if it worked on your dad, then it'll work on any bloke. So you can't fight lightning, but here's what you can do, with a greater awareness of this film that first imagined. When your lady friend suggests watching it, then you say something along the lines of:
'Gee darling, I would love to watch this film, but its a four hour celebration of white supremacy and slavery'
It is! The title is 'Gone with the wind', mourning the loss of the rich, slave-owing society of the pre-civil war south. And all the African Americans in that film. They are slaves! Where are the whip scars on their backs? Where are the scenes of them doing back-breaking labour for 12 hours to make their masters rich? Where are the scenes of when their children were sold as slaves to make more money. They aren't in the film. But it's happening, all the time. In the background. What sort of horrible shit is your girlfriend expecting you to watch here?!
The characters. All the white women are self-absorbed pains in the ass who have to take siestas in the afternoon when the weather gets a bit hot. Aww! Er, have you looked out in the fucking plantation fields recently?! You wanna talk about suffering? All they think about is Ashley bleeding Wilkes. How do you think he got to be so rich? Rhett Butler looks like he hasn't done a days work in his life. He disapproves of slavery? Oh well, that's ok then, that's that problem solved! If you're cheering when the Union troops burn Atlanta, you know you're watching the wrong film for you.
Four hours of KKK propaganda? Not tonight darling, sorry. How did you get into this shit anyway? Now I think of it, how much your mum loves white bedsheets.
To avoid tilting at the windmills of Godwin's Law here, we shall conclude. Remember to stick by your pool and just chill out.
Bisson
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